A Florescent Football?

I am not a football fan. It’s not the game that I don’t like; the little I understand is pretty exciting. Even though I’m not a big enthusiast of the violence, it’s hard not to get excited over a hard fought for touchdown! And I guess I have a few default favorites because of my hubby… that would make my college team the Arkansas Razorbacks, and NFL team the Dallas Cowboys, but as far as players and who is best, I don’t have a clue. I don’t know the difference between a quarterback and a cornerback, nor do I know what either of them does. Nevertheless, I have some ideas that would improve the televised game watching experience.

Now don’t worry, I’m not changing rules, just making a couple of minor adjustments…

Firstly, I would put a cap on the noise level for a broadcasted game. I come away from a televised game with a headache because of the boisterous crowd. You can’t understand anything they are yelling anyway, so it’s not like they are yelling to the players that someone from the opposing team is about to knock them down, like they might in baseball (which I love to watch, by the way, and I also feel these adjustments could probably apply to just as well.) I just know this could be done; they superimpose the marks for where a down is and they draw the little arrows showing where players are running, so surely it shouldn’t be too difficult. Of course most people like to simulate as closely as possible the real experience, but this is a game in my world!

Secondly, I would consider screening the announcers a little better. Some of them are real know-it-alls. I do know that some diehard fans agree with me on this one, but they disagree with each other on which announcer is being particularly annoying. Well, here’s the way we could screen them – no more than I know about the game, if I can tell they are being a know-it-all they must go, plain and simple.

Thirdly, and obviously, the most important issue is that the football should be florescent orange and this color should never be allowed for uniforms or field décor (sorry AT&T, you gotta go…) I mean, you have 10 or 15 guys all trying to pile up on a ball that’s hardly bigger than their forearm! How do you keep up with the thing? I can’t imagine how the players ever know where the little earth colored projectile is! BUT if it were bright orange it would stand out at least enough that I could spot it on the TV screen.

No trouble finding this football!

These handy little modifications could make the football watching experience a much more enjoyable one for the gridiron challenged, such as myself! At the very least, the lowered volume of the crowd and fewer annoying announcers would make it easier to ignore the as the rest of the pig skinned crazy family members rally for the third game of the day!